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Thursday, June 07, 2007

Atlantica

I didn't know this existed, or that people were so against it...

Official Website:
http://www.atlantica2007.com/defining_atlantica.php

Anti-Website:
http://www.stopatlantica.org/declaration

Tuesday, June 05, 2007

Stolen Basil

I should have posted this last summer, but I guess I was pretty pissed. Someone stole my gi-normous basil plant from the front of my place. I posted a rant on Craig's List and never looked back. I just needed to get some aggression off my back. I just took a look at my CL account and noticed a new color... PINK = Flagged/Deleted. Woo hoo!

Anyway, here it is...

F-you, you f'ing f'er! What the F?! I had a huge basil plant, just waiting to be harvested for the pesto dinner of a lifetime and you f'ing stole that sh1t right out of my yard. Dick! F-you!! What kind of derelict steals basil? Are you a bum and need to chiffonade yourself up some tasty basil to add to your trash can dinner? You know what... not all herbs can be smoked you crackhead junky FUKC! (spelled incorrectly on purpose to avoid the CL police, so don't give me any sh1t for my rant... thank you) Or are you some pretentious ass f'ed up Californian who moved here to use and abuse the system? "I know dear, let's move to Portland where we can flip a house and use all that fast cash for some blow. And while we're there we can nosh on some street eats with the Californians-turned-bums who wasted their small fortunes on blow fifteen years ago. It will be like looking into a mirror of the future." GO BACK TO CALIFORNIA YOU F'ING PRICK!! YOU OWE ME PESTO!!! Everywhere I go around town, people have signs up to the thief that stole their poppies, roses, apples, flowers, etc. Yes, Portlanders like leaving stuff out for other people to take. It's like Craig's List and Freecycle before either existed. We like participating in that community spirit. It makes us who we are. Then you come along and f'ing abuse it. Stop! If it's growing, it's not free for the taking. People take care and pride in making their plants grow. You know why my basil was so f'ing huge? Because I was out there nearly every day picking off the flowers and cutting back tops, making a salad here and there, facilitating growth. And you came by and hacked it off at its base with one fell swoop. How did you even cut it? The stalk was about as big as my pinky finger. Have you been casing my place waiting for the right time in the middle of a sunny afternoon to make your move? It wasn't wild basil... it was MY basil! Give it BACK!!!

Monday, February 19, 2007

The blind leading the stupid

If you need to, read my post Depleted Uranium... One step forward, Two steps back so that when you read this article, you can have yourself a good laugh... then cry.

Just to catch you up real quick, Sequoyah Fuels in Oklahoma was to remove 1.5 million pounds (750 tons) of DU to be stored at a former atomic-bomb test site in Nevada, when all of a sudden a leak was discovered.

"... the breach occurred because the drums have been exposed to the elements for the past 13 or 14 years."

After extensive online research, I have discovered Sequoyah Fuels "Safety" Checklist to include, AND limited, to the following...
  1. Store DU in 55 gallon drums... CHECK
  2. Seal drums... CHECK
  3. Stack drums... CHECK
  4. Store stacked drums in steel container... CHECK
  5. Seal steel container... CHECK

Lessons Learned: In future maneuvers, insert new step 1...

  1. Ensure 55 gallon drums that have been exposed to the elements for the past 13-14 years DON'T FUCKING LEAK!
"Officials say it will take another two weeks before removal of the 95,000 tons of radioactive waste remaining at the site can resume."

Not to belabor the issue of stupidity and the amateur hour that is the Associated Press, but there are 2000 pounds in one ton, but of course that was like, third grade science, so it's hard to remember. But then there is the trouble with math, and all of those zeroes can get really, REALLY confusing. And who wants to do Long Division?! Thank the LORD for Google Calculator!

Considering the fact that there are five containers remaining, that would mean that each container weighs 19,000 tons = 38 Million pounds! A Class IV Gross trailer weight rating is rated to 10,000 lbs (5 tons).

Basically it's a typo, but still something we can poke fun at and do absurd math tricks with until our calculator button pushing fingers turn blue, but all we really need to do is to change 'tons' to 'pounds' and we still have a little problem. 95,000 pounds to go, until everyone in OK is a-ok... (far from it). Ok, a little more math here (and one more okay... Okliedokliedoo),



That means they transported 1.405 millions pounds out of 1.5 million pounds to Nevada before they figured out that they were leaking? So, if you're travelling down Highway 40 jamming to a little Corey Hart, and you find the road well lit by a creepy green light, don't start turning you're lights on and off proclaiming, "Look ma, no hands!" Not only is it dangerous, but it makes the DU mad.

I'm not proud about the accuracy by which I can point out the failures of depleted uranium maneuvers, but ever since my Atari joystick broke I have had no other means by which to gauge the successes in my life.

Now back to that whole War-with-Iran thing leading up to World War III for which I will score mega points! Hooray for me :(

Tuesday, February 13, 2007

Ode to Veggie v. Meat

Oh ain't meat sweet,
I see it walking on its feet.
Well I ask you very tongue-in-cheekily:
ain't meat neat?

Oh that ain't nice,
we'll eat FT OG rice.
Yes I ask you very herbivore-ally:
who wants rice?

Just cast a ribeye
in my direction.
Oh me oh my,
ain't that perfection?

Oh I repeat
that's my favorite cut of meat.
Yes I ask you very omnivore-ally:
ain't meat sweet?

Oh who needs meat?!,
I guess I won't eat things with feet.
I'll ask you about sustainability:
why's the world replete with meat?
Well I will tell you very convincingly:
Don't eat meat!

Thursday, February 08, 2007

Which end is up?

Carageenan... good or bad? Maybe it is derived in a manner not befitting environmental health, or maybe that was what a "scientific" study proved. Maybe it's harmless. Maybe it will kill us.

What about Activist Groups? I was trying to find the site for Skin Deep (it gives the skinny (yes, pun intended) on the ingredients of soaps, shampoos, toothpastes, etc) and came across another site talking about it, so I thought I would check it out. It's a site devoted to "uncovering" where all of the activist organizations go wrong, who supports them, and basically why they are no good, corrupt entities. At first glance of the list, I thought, "Oh, I found Activist central... I subscribe to them, and them, and them... ooh, haven't heard of them, but they sound good." And they're saying they are all bad!

When I saw MADD, I thought, surely they are grasping at straws, but after reading about a few organizations I subscribe to I was in desparate need of even just the faintest glimmer of hope to pull myself out of the downward spiral of deepening depression, and I discovered that MADD can kiss my ass.

Anyway, the site is http://www.activistcash.com/index.cfm

Depleted Uranium... One step forward, Two steps back

It seems the Army is concerned about depleted uranium affecting their own soldiers who handle the munitions, so they are developing a less lethal way to kill people. Hooray for nano-ammo?

"Department of Energy officials say the use of depleted uranium in projectiles has caused concern among soldiers storing and using the material." Not to mention the fact that it is killing innocent Iraqi civilians and children, laying waste to their immune systems, ecosystems, and perpetuating birth defects for generations to come. But hey, our soldiers are concerned, so maybe we should think of alternatives.

"So scientists at the government`s Ames Laboratory at Ames, Iowa, created a nanocomposite of tungsten and metallic glass -- both of which are environmentally safe materials that work even better than depleted uranium." Yeah!!! They kill people even better! ...and environmentally friendly to boot. I can see it now - a new slogan, "Organic bombs, not hugs!" for a newer, greener generation of war criminals, I mean Republicans - no Democrats... oh fuck it... Americans. It's a good feeling being on the side of the guys with the guns. Makes me feel all safe and warm inside.

But wait, that's not all... In other make-depleted-uranium-go-away news, it seems that Sequoyah Fuels in Oklahoma is prepping for the removal of a 1.5 million pounds (750 tons) of DU to be stored deep within, uhm, sealed 55 gallon drums. But not to worry, because those 55 gallon drums will be stacked on top of each other for maximum safety. Not only will they be stacked, but those very same 55-gallon drums will be stored deep within, uhm, a much larger steel container! No worries - it will be welded AND sealed... Hooray!! Our depleted uranium woes are no longer!!! Yes indeed, no sense worrying about DU anymore. Why, I'll just go ahead and unsubscribe from my "Depleted Uranium" Google Alerts and then on to bigger and better news stories... like butterflies... and other, uhm, things.

What's that you say? Where will they store those welded AND sealed steel containers full of stacked 55-gallon drums of bright green depleted uranium? Hmmm, where has all of this been leading? Perhaps they will be stored deep within the EARTH? HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH... HAHAHA... uhm, no. Nevada... stoopid!

Although the article actually says it will be buried in Nevada, I believe that "buried" is simply a euphemism for "put San Francisco at risk of breathing in DU aerosols from DU weapons testing causing severe health problems, from cancers to diabetes, asthma, birth defects, organ damage, heart failure and auto-immune system diseases." But that's kind of reading a lot into one little word... or is it?

It seems that a lab outside of SF is going to be stepping up their DU weapons testing.

"Livermore National Laboratory has been testing radioactive devices – exploding depleted uranium and tritium into the open air – just 50 miles east of San Francisco since 1961. And now the lab has a permit to raise the amount of radioactive material they detonate yearly from 1,000 to 8,000 pounds."

So maybe it's all speculation, since 8000 lbs is a far cry from 1M, but still, we are about to launch a nuclear war against Iran (hence "testing"), don't want this nasty stuff on our own soil (hence packaging for transportation), can surely turn a profit selling it to Israel (aka "in bed with")...

Monday, February 05, 2007

Janet Jackson and Oprah

There are two things that have caused me to get queasy watching television (this coming from the guy that watched Faces of Death in high school and thought, mmm... monkey brains sho' do look tasty!). Anyway, one was Janet Jackson's nipslip during the Superbowl half time show. (What's wrong with me? am I getting old? That used to be my fantasy! The Patrick Demarchelier cover of Rolling Stone magazine was like free porn.) The other was Oprah bringing Shawn Hornbeck on her show after having been home for one week after being rescued from his kidnapper Michael Devlin. Not only did Oprah disgust me, but the entire world of TV media disgusted me. For the next few weeks, every time you turned on the TV, someone was pontificating the true nature of the relationship Shawn and Devlin, or why didn't Shawn try to escape, or what really happened behind closed doors, etc. I'm not saying that Oprah was the first or only person to exhibit poor judgement... the parents certainly were a factor, as were the media moguls. Hopefully all of the money Shawn's parents made from their various television appearances will cover half of the therapy Shawn will need, not only for the trauma suffered at the hands of Michael Devlin, but for the trauma suffered from the abuse of the televisionistas. What if it turns out that Shawn was abused beyond anything anyone can tolerate imagining, something to make us once hardcore Faces of Death fans turn green? What if it turns out that Shawn loved Devlin? Holy crap! Either of those scenarios would be far too much for the public to handle. Why, there would be a media frenzy! Shawn seems to be pretty well put together despite the improper actions on the part of Devlin, his parents, the media, and yes, even Oprah. I posted my comments of disapproval on Oprah's website, and I certainly wasn't the only one.

PS
I still fantasize about Janet, and I still TiVo Oprah.

http://boards.oprah.com/WebX?tree@77.e3kkcg8b7pb.106462@.f13a447/1367!view=C

Two wrongs make it worse
Posted on: 01/19/2007 at 5:28pm

First of all, I want to tell Shawn that I am very glad he is home. I hope you’re doing well, and I wish that you are given the amount of time that you require for your own healing. I find it very likely that you may not only read these posts, but that you may even contribute yourself, perhaps under an alias, perhaps as yourself. I’m sure you know the Internet is full of self-righteous surfers with a million opinions (admittedly, I am one of them). I hope you are able to bypass all of those opinions that are discouraging to you and give yourself time to heal. Stay strong!

The second part of this post is to Oprah. I believe in you Oprah. When you told everyone about getting flipped off by the guy who had a car just like yours, I nearly cried I was laughing so hard. When you give away stuff on the show, I get as excited as if I were there. But... when I saw Shawn on tv, I felt a sinking feeling like I was watching the most disgusting, nauseating event in history. I believe in you Oprah! I really do. I believe in the things you do and what you stand for. I wanted to believe that this was going to turn out ok. That you would use this tragedy as a vehicle for awareness, referring back to the media reports as support for your cause, sending well wishes and invitations to appear on Oprah when Shawn had healed and felt comfortable in his own skin again. I believe you suffered a serious error in judgment by not only interviewing him and airing it, but also in having Shawn in your studio audience. Please forgive me for "going there" but how would you have felt if your parents brought you on The Tonight Show or some other national television talk show after you were molested. Maybe you would have had the forethought to get the message out, the strength to fight for those that couldn’t fight. And you did... you brought the fight to the public and people are far more aware now than ever before... but that was on your own terms, after you had a chance to cope, reason things out, ask why, why me, and what next. It took you 32 years to talk about your rape on tv, and it was on a Chicago television program named The Oprah Winfrey Show prior to becoming nationally broadcast. I do not recall a 43 year old Shawn, host of the Shawn Hornbeck Show, discussing with the audience of HIS national television show, the details, or even simply the admission of the trauma that he endured. It was one week! Shame on you, Oprah.